2001-11-07 - 10:36 p.m.
Today was so shit! I mean, i have good days and bad days with pain and so on but today just sucked in every way! I dont get out of the house every so all i hve to look foward to is morning telly and my mum getting in from work. Only today every one was out and when mum finaly got home she was in such a bad mood i just ended up crying.
When i was in hosptial i spent every day with mum, it was really nice, and when she went away at the begining of the wekk she said she ouwld really miss me cos we had spent so much time together. I wanted to talk to her about 'stuff' about being ill and what i wanted to do about carrying on with life the best i can, but she just wouldnt talk. When i finaly got her on to the subject, my sisters got in! I need her so bad at the moment, i know its hard for every one my being ill, but its hard for me too! I want her to suport me, her to rap her arms around me and tell me everythings going to be ok. Thats what she would normaly do but at the moment im lucky to get a smile. I dont know, may be im not the best patient in the world!
I guess i shouls go to bed, im really out of it. But you know when you get to that point where your past tiered but your minds still buzzing with things you want to get out only you cant talk cos your so out of it? Oh well it makes sence to me! cos thats about where i am now!
Oh well, here goes nothing!
Night xx
send me luuuuvvv - Sunday, May. 02, 2004
newly free! - Monday, Mar. 22, 2004
its not goodbye - Friday, Mar. 12, 2004
burp - Sunday, Mar. 07, 2004
filling in :-) - Thursday, Mar. 04, 2004